The Next Battle

Lost in the WoodsBy the time I had kids old enough for preschool I knew I was  never going to send them. I started doing preschool at home with them. We did crazy things like painting with chocolate pudding, using bubble mix on the  floor and scooting from one side of the kitchen to the other. We made alphabet  letters out of dough and ate them.  We  did crafts of all kinds. It was so fun! I knew I wanted to do this for “real”  school as well. It was a difficult decision because in some states it was  illegal and in others it was a recipe for harassment from the local school  authorities. My husband’s real fear was that our children would be taken away  from us.

We moved to Texas which  was a huge blessing. The Leeper case was making its way through the Texas courts,  challenging the legal status of homeschooling. That meant that homeschooling was  temporally legal and the authorities couldn’t harass parents that chose to  homeschool.  The battle was about  academic excellence. How could a homeschool provide an equivalent education as  the public school?

So, once my oldest son reached compulsory school age, I went  down to the local school superintendent to sign the papers to be allowed to  homeschool. The woman was less than supportive, and was just short of rude  about the whole thing. As I left the office she said rudely, “You know,  teaching is harder than you think.  You  will not be able to do this. We will accept your son at the elementary school  after Christmas break when you realize this was a bad decision.” That stiffened  my resolve. There was no way my son was attending school in this district!

Once the Leeper case was decided in favor of homeschooling,  other states started the process to legalize homeschooling, some willingly,  others fighting it tooth and nail. That was the first homeschool battle - Was  homeschooling legal? Yes, it was and we won the battle.  Homeschooling could provide an excellent  education.

The second battle homeschoolers have fought is the battle  cry,  ”But what about socialization?”  When my oldest got to be high school age the critics came out of the woodwork,  telling us that we were ruining our children because they would lack the social  skills to make it in the real world. Well, I knew the real world was not high  school! Now that homeschoolers are out in the real world, working, being  parents, and gasp! graduating from college and doing it with style, the critics  had to find a new battle cry against homeschooling.

Michael Farris,  Founder of Homeschool Legal Defense   Association, in an article entitled “The Third Wave of Homeschooling  Persecution” states, a new wave of attack is heading our way. But whereas  the last two attacks have been proven false, this one is true, especially for  LDS homeschoolers. This is an attack we need to know about and actively work  to fight against. The argument according to Farris is “Christian homeschoolers  are effectively transmitting values to their children that elitists believe are  dangerous to the well-being of both these very children and society as a  whole.”

What are those  values? Marriage is ordained of God and should be between a man and a woman;  Jesus Christ is our Savior; there is a moral compass of right and wrong. All  the values that make up a religious upbringing for our children and that allow  us to pass on our religious beliefs to the next generation.

Michael Farris quotes Kimberly A. Yuracko, a professor from  Northwestern University School of Law, from an article in the California Law  Review, that there are legal and constitutional limits on the ability of  homeschooling parents to “teach their children idiosyncratic and illiberal  beliefs and values”. She states that there must be new legal mandates of  government control of educational choices for those children whose “parents  want to teach against the enlightenment”. Enlightenment? That’s an interesting  way of putting it.

In the May  2010 issue  of the William and Mary Bill of Rights Journal, Catherine Ross, a law professor  from George Washington Law School, published an article entitled  “Fundamentalist Challenge to Core Democratic Values: Exit and Homeschooling” states; ”Many Liberal  political theorists argue, however, that there are limits to tolerance. In  order for the norm of tolerance to survive across generations, society need not  and should not tolerate the inculcation of absolutist views that undermine  toleration of difference. Respect for differences should not be confused with  approval for approaches that would splinter us into countless warring groups.  Hence an argument  that tolerance for  diverse views and values is a foundational principle does not conflict with the  notion that the state can and should limit the ability of intolerant  homeschoolers to inculcate hostility to difference in their children—at least  during the portion of the day they claim to devote to satisfying the compulsory  schooling requirement.”

She continues, “ If a parent  subscribes to an absolute belief system premised on the notion that it was handed  down by a creator, that it (like the Ten Commandments ) is etched in stone and  that all other systems are wrong, the essential lessons of a civil education  (i.e., tolerance and mutual respect) often seem deeply challenging and suspect.   If the core principle in a parent’s belief system is that there is only one  immutable truth that cannot be questioned, many educational topics will be off  limits. Such “private truths” have no place in the public arena, including  public schools.“

Ms. Ross’s solution  to the problem is mandatory curriculum requirements and state oversight. And if  we really want to end this problem, private education should be banned. All of  it, private, religious and homeschools.

She closes with, “Parental expressive interest could supplement, but never  supplant the public institutions where the basic and fundamental lesson would  be taught and experienced by all American children: we must struggle together  to define ourselves both as a collective and as individuals”.

The word collective  is a frightening word. The Constitution and collectives are mutually exclusive. We can see the evidence of this thinking in what is  happening in the public schools, especially in California where parental rights  are being eroded away in the name of tolerance and enlightenment. Children are  being taught things that go against the values of their parents without their  parent’s knowledge or permission!

There is much more to understand in the article, including  information on the U. N. Convention on the Rights of the Child. This is a  dangerous treaty that will seriously curtail parental rights and help make our  children wards of the state. It is not something to ignore.

So, how do we fight this growing trend? Is it possible for  us to prevail against such growing evil? Michael Farris thinks we can. We have   won before, against formidable odds. As he puts it, the only reason we won the  last battles was because the Lord was on our side! He believes the Lord will  help us win this one too. But we have to watch and be ready. Here are some ways he  suggests:

  1. We still need homeschooling organizations! This  is how we won the last battles. When information needs to get  to the people quickly, homeschool  organizations can pass it along promptly.(I remember a few years ago, in New Jersey, the state legislature wanted  to put limits on homeschoolers. The word went out and hundreds of people were  at the state capital, letting the law makers know that this was not what the  people wanted. The legislation didn’t pass. There is power in the people!)
  2. Pass the Parental Rights Amendment.  We must defeat the CRC! If we lose our rights  as parents we will also lose our rights to our children. A chilling thought.
  3. Never give up! With God on our side we can  prevail!

My fear is that new  homeschoolers will not understand the battles we have fought to be able to  educate our children as we see fit. Now is a time of acceptance and  complacency for homeschoolers. It would be  easy to think that our rights are ever secure, but history and events of the  day show us this is not true.

Michael Farris concludes: “Persecution is on its  way. It is in the law reviews today. It will be in the courtrooms tomorrow.  They are going to try to win. They are going to throw everything at us they can….. Truth is on our side. Freedom is on our side. The American Constitution is on our side. And all of that  matters, so long as we remain faithfully on God’s side. Stand up for Jesus  and He will never leave us or forsake  us.“

I pray that it is so!

To read the Michael Farris article in full click here.

To learn more about The Convention on the Rights  of the Child, Click here. 

Dr. Seuss Party!

 

Writing is a Blast

We celebrate  reading in March to commemorate Dr. Seuss's birthday. Every year we throw a  party with our home school friends and others... this year you are invited to  throw a party of your own! Here is how we do it:

Pick the date.

Dr. Seuss  was born on March 2nd and was a great contributor to young children's success  in reading.  The books are fun and the  illustrations are fabulous! Our party is not always on the 2nd, but is in the  month of March.

The Cat in the HatInvite people EARLY. Send out a  red and white striped invitation and ask people to do and bring a couple of  things:

2. Each child is required to share with the group.1. It's a potluck, so bring a Dr. Seuss inspired food (green  eggs and ham always show up) or a food based on your favorite book (biscuits  from Little House on the Prairie, bananas from Curious George, etc.)

  • Elementary  aged children tell about their favorite book.
  • Middle  and High School students write and tell about their favorite author.

3. Each child needs to bring "A Shelf for Myself". 4. Please bring gently used books for the Book Swap.

Before the Party Ask parents  to go through their bookshelves and donate books they no longer want. We ask  around the neighborhood to gather books, too. Set up a  long table for the kids to place their "A Shelf for Myself" boxes. Set up the  dining area for the pot luck snacks. The GrintchSet up the room where all will share their favorite books. Hide a Dr.  Seuss's Grinch (or other character)  in your house in plain sight... give a prize for anyone who finds it. At the Party Welcome  everyone at the door in costume. You can have book covers hanging on the wall, a  "Cat in the Hat" hat making station, name tags,  "name that famous Dr. Seuss character"  game, or there are tons of fun ideas to do online. Party  Itinerary

  • guests  arrive.
  • have  them put food, and "A Shelf for Myself" in the appropriate place.  Invite one or 2 parents to set up the Book Swap.
  • "Guess  the Dr. Seuss Character" game.
  • Tell  them the Grinch is hiding around the house, to find him--but don't tell the  others.
  • Right  before the presentations, hand out paper and pencils so kids can write down  book titles they would like to read from the presentations and from the book  shelves.
  • Book  Presentations.
  • Invite  all to have snacks and browse through the "A Shelf for Myself" area.
  • Book  Swap. (We have the kids line up youngest to oldest and they each get to pick 1  book the first time through. Depending on how many books you have we just have  them keep going through until the books are gone. One year a friend was moving  and donated seven boxes of books! Everyone went home with an armload and a BIG  smile!).

 

A bookshelf for myselfThis is a  fun way to continue encouraging reading and we always love to throw a party!  The kids can have some fun dressing up and sharing. Our kids always come home  with a list of new books to read! Success!

"A Shelf For  Myself" Kids love to  have their "own" books. Each of the kids have their own bookshelf in  their room where special books are kept. We have a family library in the school  room and hallway, but the bookshelf in their room is just for them. When we have  our Dr. Seuss party in March, we invite all the young kids to bring "A  Shelf for Myself" made from a paper box. Simply take a box and cut off all  but one flap. Tip it over and you have a shelf! (The extra flap is a cover for  the box when it is time to transport.) We encourage all the kids to decorate  their shelf with paper then choose some of their favorite books to put on their  shelf. It is fun to see which titles they choose--which books have made a  difference to them!

Let the Holy Spirit Guide

A Day in the Life with Pearls of Great Price

The Joy, Journey and JuxtapositionA few years ago, my daughter and I received interesting gifts from my mother-in-law:  individually canned gift oysters.  I was appreciative and intrigued by them, but for some reason I had a feeling that we should wait to “open” them. I wasn’t sure what we were waiting for exactly; I just knew that when we received them wasn’t the time, so I tucked them away with other “ocean stuff.”

Fast forward something like five years, to this week, when I discovered that today was the day to open the oysters!  I didn’t know today was the day until this morning, but when I realized it, I was sure glad I’d been given the gift and had saved it.  I was also glad for a marvelously wise Father in Heaven who knows all, and for the communication of the Holy Ghost who told me when to wait, and when to act.

My family is currently doing an astronomy unit.  In my preparations to bring the scriptures into the unit, I was studying the book of Abraham.  It occurred to me that before delving into what was revealed to Abraham, we should talk about who he was and how we came to have his revelations.  Using the Pearl of Great Price Student Manual produced by the Church, I went to make sure I had my facts straight.  In the process, I came across a statement that affected me:

“The Prophet Joseph Smith never communicated his method of translating these records. As with all other scriptures, a testimony of the truthfulness of these writings is primarily a matter of faith....”

I then thought of all the books we Latter-day Saints call scripture and it came to mind that three of the four originate with Joseph Smith:  he translated the Book of Mormon, the Doctrine and Covenants is the collection of revelations received mostly by him, and the Pearl of Great Price contains his history, his translations, revisions of the Bible as revealed to him, along with the statements of our faith written by him.  I realized that I had never stopped to consider how much Joseph Smith’s hands had touched all of my core beliefs.  I guess I’d always just thought of the scriptures as, well, scripture, and accepted that in a matter-of-fact way.

As I sat pondering this, I realized that it was “Testimony Tuesday.”  (In my home we’re doing rotating daily devotionals, with recurring daily themes.)  I decided it was the perfect dual lesson; we’d diagram what all of our scriptures are and where each book came from, talk about how you really have to have a testimony of Joseph Smith as a prophet of God to accept most of our scriptures (or, if you have a testimony that these scriptures are the word of God, it must then follow that Joseph Smith was a prophet), and it would segue into Abraham and astronomy.

I sat down with my children to begin.  In a flash, by direction of the Spirit, a powerful lesson was laid out before me.  We read Matthew 13:45-46:  “Again, the kingdom of heaven is like unto a merchant man, seeking goodly pearls:  Who, when he had found one pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had, and bought it.”

I pulled out the string of pearls my husband and children gave me for Christmas and asked the kids if they knew where pearls come from.

pearls on the halfshell

 I then pulled out the canned gift oysters and everyone watched, fascinated, as I pried open the shell and then poked and squeezed the wet, fleshy tissue of the shellfish in search of a pearl.

We talked about why pearls are so valuable.  This led to a search as to the history of pearl gathering, which sheds enormous light on Matthew 13:45-46.  Unlike gold or precious gems, pearls are not mined from the ground, nor must they be cut and polished; a pearl’s beauty is natural and needs no intervention from man.  Pearls are the only gem made by a living organism, emanating a warm luster like an inner glow rather than a cold, shiny sparkle.  In ancient times, pearls were extraordinarily rare, and finding them was difficult and dangerous. It took searching (and destroying) beds of many mollusks to collect just a few gems.  It’s written that at the height of the Roman Empire, and entire military campaign was financed by Roman general Vitellius by selling just one of his mother’s pearl earrings.[1] And while these days we’ve learned to culture and farm pearls, naturally occurring pearls are still rare and expensive.  It’s no wonder we refer to pearls in the way we do with phrases like “pearls of wisdom,” and that the Lord spoke of “casting pearls before swine.”[2]

So, the kingdom of heaven, meaning the kingdom of God on earth, meaning the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, is compared to a pearl of great price,[3] and we have a book of translations, narrations, and revelations named as such.  How, then, should we consider this book of scripture?  Why should this particular book of scripture be named “Pearl of Great Price”?

“Elder Milton R. Hunter, who was a member of the Seventy, said that the Pearl of Great Price is ‘a pearl indeed.’ He then explained the uniqueness of its sacred writings:

“’They are compacted in approximately sixty pages, but every page is dynamic and powerful. It is a wonderful book.

“’The Pearl of Great Price...contains revelations on certain subjects superior to any other scriptures or writings on those subjects found in the world...”[4]

“Elder Mark E. Petersen, who was a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, testified that the Pearl of Great Price ‘contains some of the greatest revelations of God to man.’”[5]

So, that was our lesson, with all its layers. I think that having to dig out those pearls from the squishy body of the oyster made an impression that nicely demonstrated the importance and value of scripture. I recommend the object lesson.  But more than that, I want to bear my testimony that the Holy Ghost is real and that God does indeed know all. It was at least five years ago that we received those oysters and I knew I shouldn’t open them then. I could never have known I’d need them for today. And I didn’t have a real plan for our discussion this morning until this morning—it came to me, along with the reminder that I had those oysters. (And it was a miracle I could even find them! That was the Holy Ghost’s doing as well.) I know that as we seek, ask, and listen, we’ll be directed to those lessons, methods, and experiences that will mean the most and make lasting impressions.  Homeschooling is so much more effective when we partner with the Lord.


[1] Monica’s of Melbourne. (n.d.). Pearl Jewelry, The Magic of Pearls. A 2 Z of Health, Beauty and Fitness. Retrieved  March 13, 2012.  From http://health.learninginfo.org/pearl-jewelry.htm

[2] Matthew 7:6

[3] McConkie, Bruce R. (1966). Mormon Doctrine (2nd ed.). Salt Lake City, UT:  Bookcraft, Inc.

[4] Intellectual Reserve (2000). The Pearl of great Price Student Manual.

[5]Ibid

The Spirit is the Ultimate Teacher

by Andrew Wood

 

We’ve all heard prophets and apostles teach about the magnificence of the rising generation. Recently, Elder David A Bednar said: "Parents and Church leaders frequently emphasize that the young men and young women of this generation have been reserved for this season in the history of the world and are some of the most valiant of Heavenly Father’s children. Indeed, such statements are true." (In “Things as they really are” BYU address May 3 2009)

I, for one, reading these words feel their truth, and am grateful to have prophets in our day that can help us see things as they really are. The Lord knows each of us, and wants us all to return to Him. In these trying times He has reserved a special generation to come forth and ultimately change the world. The Lord said:"Verily, verily, I say unto you, I give unto you to be the salt of the earth; but if the salt shall lose its savor wherewith shall the earth be salted? The salt shall be thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out and to be trodden under foot of men.” (3 Nephi 12:13)

Recently, I have given a lot of thought to these truths. Last week the question came to mind “Wait a minute, what about the previous generation?” I hope that in our zeal to buoy up our children and youth, we do not lose sight of the Lord’s love and respect for the parents and guides of this precious generation. Truly the Lord would not send His choice spirits to earth without sending parents capable of teaching them to harness their capacity for righteousness. I know the Lord has a plan for each and every generation. He has sent us to earth to be examples to this rising generation. We must not forget to live up to our divine potential in mortality. We can’t teach our youth to stand up and be who ‘they really are’ unless we are striving to be who we need to be.

The Lord has given us guidance to know how to rear our children. The beauty of teaching in the home is that it gives us the flexibility to custom fit the education to our children’s needs. We know who they are supposed to be. We can help them see it and reach it by reaching it ourselves. It is said that education is not the filling of a bucket, but the lighting of a fire. Can we help them ignite their flame if ours are only cooled embers? Our thirst for knowledge and wisdom will transfer to our children. It’s highly contagious. I am sure you can think of times when your children’s insatiable curiosity has rekindled your own. 

Whether the analogy be fire or salt, we know what the Lord expects of us. We have a duty to Him and to our children. We must be the mentors for the generation "with the greatest capacity for righteousness" (Elder Neal A Maxwell, as quoted by Elder Bednar, Liahona June 2010).

We generally know what attributes we or our children need to work on, but often we are unaware of microscopic flaws in our character that translate into macroscopic issues in the culture of our families and homes. (More on family culture in a later article). By way of practicality, I have often observed that the best introspection is honest and prayerful reflection. Each home, each family, each individual differs greatly. The dynamic of having so many “individuals” crammed together into a “family” can generate "growth experiences" to say the least. 

I wish I could give you a ready recipe for success complete with “To Do” lists and colorful reminders, but the only surefire way to succeed in the home is to ask Heavenly Father how He wants this child raised. Each child is different, and we must be able to adapt to their abilities and limitations, their strengths and weaknesses. The best way to do that is to foster a home where the Spirit is the ultimate teacher, the one who has all the answers to all the questions. If you give a child an answer, you satisfy them for a moment, if you teach a child to receive their own answers from Heaven, they “shall not hunger, neither shall [they] thirst”. That is the path to eternal life and fulfilling our missions in mortality.

The Lord will not leave us alone or abandoned if we but seek His will for His precious youth. He knows we can succeed. He will never set us up for failure. We simply must have the faith to face the challenge of rearing this great generation.

Leave a comment for our guest writer here!

Runaway Days

by Michele Bolton

Originally published in July of 2005 in the Sentinel

"Some days are like that. Even in Australia."

Have you ever felt like poor Alexander in Judith Viorst's Alexander and the Horrible, Terrible, No- Good, Very-Bad Day? You know the kind of day I'm talking about: A previous night's-worth of insufficient sleep, accompanied by bags under the eyes that seem to stretch your whole body down to your knees? The kind of day that finds some perfumed, painted and pompadoured neighbor/friend/Relief Society sister (pick one, I've had 'em all) at your door while you stand in your holey jeans and two- day-old t-shirt with wet hair (hey, I give you credit, at least you're clean) surrounded by your darlin' little monkeys in various stages of mood and dress? The kind where your bed isn't made and all the rooms are declared National Disaster Areas, where one child won't do his math while another won't stop following you around the house asking "Why?" and the baby is sitting on the dining table cheerfully consuming an open jar of peanut butter whilst wearing a diaper you're sure no HAZMAT team would touch? Where your mother calls "just to let you know" how Dad is so worried your kids will be backwards troglodytes in Plato's cave because you don't put them in public school? You feel flat as a pancake without baking powder, life seems a bleak, barren desert of unending chores filled with restless little natives who make "Mom!" sound like a swear word, and no end in sight.

So what's a rational woman to do? I don't know. Rational is the last word I'd use to describe me, even on my most "with it" days. This mad woman, after clonking her head against the wall a couple of times to clear out the fog, stands up straight, and in her most decisive tone possible declares, "Runaway Day!"

Now, you say, responsible people don't run away. They stick it out, come what may. (Ooh, a cute little rhyme!) But, when you're at the end of your rope on your very last nerve, something has to happen. And our solution is to...run away.

I am not saying, "throw in the towel, chuck it all," well, at least, not forever. Just for a day, or two. We work hard, really, most of the time, sitting down and doing our "lessons" (we hate to say "school") so I think it's okay to say "We've had enough. Let's take a break." It gives us permission to step back, take the load off for a while and regroup. It doesn't tell my kids to be lazy or quitters or to not face their problems. It says that a strategic retreat every once in a while can actually help win a war.

Our first runaway day was in the late spring, early summer of our first year in a new home, new area, having moved further from family and friends. Boy was slogging along at his lessons, baby Girl was glued to my leg. I was lonely, depressed and feeling a little housebound. Inspiration struck, we packed up and headed to the lake where I sat and watched my kids play in the sand and test the waters (we even spotted a fish!). We went home tired, sandy and altogether satisfied. Hubby asked, "What did you do today?" My response? "We ran away for the day." He shrugged his shoulders, being by-now accustomed to my weird ideas and dialog, totally trusting in me as a wife and mother to keep everyone safe and happy.

And you know what? We were. The next day we still had to face mathematics and dirty dishes and the awesome task of carving a niche in a new land, but we'd had a break, and were stronger now to face what had to be done, lessons, housework, et. al. Call it escapism, call it what you will, running away now and then is good for the soul.

The Next Battle...

by Dana Wood


When I first started thinking about homeschooling my children it was in the early Eighties. Very few people were even thinking about homeschooling and those who were, people thought were anti-social, wacky people. For that reason my husband was less than enthusiastic about the idea. 

By the time I had kids old enough for preschool I knew I was never going to send them. I started doing preschool at home with them. We did crazy things like painting with chocolate pudding, using bubble mix on the floor and scooting from one side of the kitchen to the other. We made alphabet letters out of dough and ate them.  We did crafts of all kinds. It was so fun! I knew I wanted to do this for “real” school as well. It was a difficult decision because in some states it was illegal and in others it was a recipe for harassment from the local school authorities. My husband’s real fear was that our children would be taken away from us. 

We moved to Texas which was a huge blessing. The Leeper case was making its way through the Texas courts, challenging the legal status of homeschooling. That meant that homeschooling was temporally legal and the authorities couldn’t harass parents that chose to homeschool.  The battle was about academic excellence. How could a homeschool provide an equivalent education as the public school? 

So, once my oldest son reached compulsory school age, I went down to the local school superintendent to sign the papers to be allowed to homeschool. The woman was less than supportive, and was just short of rude about the whole thing. As I left the office she said rudely, “You know, teaching is harder than you think.  You will not be able to do this. We will accept your son at the elementary school after Christmas break when you realize this was a bad decision.” That stiffened my resolve. There was no way my son was attending school in this district!

Once the Leeper case was decided in favor of homeschooling, other states started the process to legalize homeschooling, some willingly, others fighting it tooth and nail. That was the first homeschool battle - Was homeschooling legal? Yes, it was and we won the battle.  Homeschooling could provide an excellent education.

The second battle homeschoolers have fought is the battle cry,  ”But what about socialization?” When my oldest got to be high school age the critics came out of the woodwork, telling us that we were ruining our children because they would lack the social skills to make it in the real world. Well, I knew the real world was not high school! Now that homeschoolers are out in the real world, working, being parents, and gasp! graduating from college and doing it with style, the critics had to find a new battle cry against homeschooling.

Michael Farris, Founder of Homeschool Legal Defense  Association, in an article entitled “The Third Wave of Homeschooling Persecution” states, a new wave of attack is heading our way. But whereas the last two attacks have been proven false, this one is true, especially for LDS homeschoolers. This is an attack we need to know about and actively work to fight against. The argument according to Farris is “Christian homeschoolers are effectively transmitting values to their children that elitists believe are dangerous to the well-being of both these very children and society as a whole.”

What are those values? Marriage is ordained of God and should be between a man and a woman; Jesus Christ is our Savior; there is a moral compass of right and wrong. All the values that make up a religious upbringing for our children and that allow us to pass on our religious beliefs to the next generation. 

Michael Farris quotes Kimberly A. Yuracko, a professor from Northwestern University School of Law, from an article in the California Law Review, that there are legal and constitutional limits on the ability of homeschooling parents to “teach their children idiosyncratic and illiberal beliefs and values”. She states that there must be new legal mandates of government control of educational choices for those children whose “parents want to teach against the enlightenment”. Enlightenment? That’s an interesting way of putting it.

In the May  2010 issue of the William and Mary Bill of Rights Journal, Catherine Ross, a law professor from George Washington Law School, published an article entitled “Fundamentalist Challenge to Core Democratic Values: Exit and Homeschooling” states; ”Many Liberal political theorists argue, however, that there are limits to tolerance. In order for the norm of tolerance to survive across generations, society need not and should not tolerate the inculcation of absolutist views that undermine toleration of difference. Respect for differences should not be confused with approval for approaches that would splinter us into countless warring groups. Hence an argument  that tolerance for diverse views and values is a foundational principle does not conflict with the notion that the state can and should limit the ability of intolerant homeschoolers to inculcate hostility to difference in their children—at least during the portion of the day they claim to devote to satisfying the compulsory schooling requirement.”

She continues, “ If a parent subscribes to an absolute belief system premised on the notion that it was handed down by a creator, that it (like the Ten Commandments ) is etched in stone and that all other systems are wrong, the essential lessons of a civil education (i.e., tolerance and mutual respect) often seem deeply challenging and suspect. If the core principle in a parent’s belief system is that there is only one immutable truth that cannot be questioned, many educational topics will be off limits. Such “private truths” have no place in the public arena, including public schools.“

Ms. Ross’s solution to the problem is mandatory curriculum requirements and state oversight. And if we really want to end this problem, private education should be banned. All of it, private, religious and homeschools. 

She closes with, “Parental expressive interest could supplement, but never supplant the public institutions where the basic and fundamental lesson would be taught and experienced by all American children: we must struggle together to define ourselves both as a collective and as individuals”. 

The word collective is a frightening word. The Constitution and collectives are mutually exclusive. We can see the evidence of this thinking in what is happening in the public schools, especially in California where parental rights are being eroded away in the name of tolerance and enlightenment. Children are being taught things that go against the values of their parents without their parent’s knowledge or permission!

There is much more to understand in the article, including information on the U. N. Convention on the Rights of the Child. This is a dangerous treaty that will seriously curtail parental rights and help make our children wards of the state. It is not something to ignore. 

So, how do we fight this growing trend? Is it possible for us to prevail against such growing evil? Michael Farris thinks we can. We have won before, against formidable odds. As he puts it, the only reason we won the last battles was because the Lord was on our side! He believes the Lord will help us win this one too. But we have to watch and be ready. Here are some ways he suggests:

  1. We still need homeschooling organizations! This is how we won the last battles. When information needs to get  to the people quickly, homeschool organizations can pass it along promptly.  

    (I remember a few years ago, in New Jersey, the state legislature wanted to put limits on homeschoolers. The word went out and hundreds of people were at the state capital, letting the law makers know that this was not what the people wanted. The legislation didn’t pass. There is power in the people!)
     
  2. Pass the Parental Rights Amendment.  We must defeat the CRC! If we lose our rights as parents we will also lose our rights to our children. A chilling thought. 
     
  3. Never give up! With God on our side we can prevail!

My fear is that new homeschoolers will not understand the battles we have fought to be able to educate our children as we see fit. Now is a time of acceptance and  complacency for homeschoolers. It would be easy to think that our rights are ever secure, but history and events of the day show us this is not true. 

Michael Farris concludes: “Persecution is on its way. It is in the law reviews today. It will be in the courtrooms tomorrow. They are going to try to win. They are going to throw everything at us they can….. Truth is on our side. Freedom is on our side. The American Constitution is on our side. And all of that matters, so long as we remain faithfully on God’s side. Stand up for Jesus and He will never leave us or forsake us.“

I pray that it is so!

To read the Michael Farris article in full click here.

To learn more about The Convention on the Rights of the Child, Click here.  

You can leave your thoughts, comments or suggestions here on my feedback page. Thanks!

- Dana

Back Talking Cure

by Nicholeen Peck 

 

Question:

“How do you stop children from back talking?”

Answer:

Children talking back, or sassing, to their parents seems to be a behavior many children experiment with.  At different phases of development feelings of independence and intelligence emerge causing kids to talk back. 

Ironically, parents spend lots of energy reinforcing the intelligence of their children, and teaching the children how to think for themselves.  If we spend so many years moving our child toward self-governing thoughts and behaviors, why do we care so much about back talking children and back talking teenagers? 

Respect

Respect is a vital part of learning self-government.  Without an attitude of respect the child or teenager is doomed to fail in life. 

Successes in life are built upon successful relationships.  Any sales person can tell you this.  If a person trusts you and feels appreciated and respected by you, then they will give you more trust, more money, more affection, or more opportunity. 

Respect is a feeling of trust, acceptance, mercy and love.  Families are built on feelings like these.  When a parent feels respected she will happily serve a child more and be more willing to sacrifice for the happiness of the child. 

Likewise, if a parent feels disrespect from the child, she will naturally become more controlling and negative toward the child. 

Naturally, children offer similar positive and negative rewards to parents who treat them with disrespect.  It is imperative that we understand there is a difference between good traditional strict parenting based on solid principles and calm communication, and disrespectful parenting manifested by feelings of disapproval, contention, superiority, and lack of understanding.

Respect is a feeling!

Aesop Knows Best

“The Blind Man And The Whelp”

A blind man was accustomed to distinguish different animals by touching them with his hands.  The whelp of a wolf was brought him, with a request that he would feel it, and say what it was. He felt it and being in doubt said, “I do not quite know whether is is the cub of a fox, or the whelp of a wolf; but this I know full well, that it would not be safe to admit him into the sheepfold.   

The Heart Of Respect

At the heart of all behavior problems such as kids talking back, there is a selfish heart.  This heart can be felt,even if the child is trying to deny the problem.  Just as the blind man could feel the danger of allowing the pup he held in his hands into a sheepfold, we also feel the selfish heart of the child talking back and know the home environment is not safe. 

Since a selfish heart is at the heart of the back talking problem, that is the first place to focus our energies in order to stop the back talking. 

This issue with back talking is never about what is said, it is about what is felt.  So, as a parent, the first thing to remember is that when a child is talking back, never acknowledge the words being said.  The child is attempting to initiate a power struggle, which means you need to have enough self-government not to power struggle back.  Hearts rarely change in the middle of an argument. 

Before you say anything, make sure you check the way you feel.  Focus your energy on letting your heart speak to their heart.  Practice speaking with love, understanding, and truth. 

How To Stop Back Talking

  1. Focus on your tone, and on reaching their heart
  2. Never talk back to a back talker
  3. Have negative consequences for back talking and do a proper correction
  4. Teach your child how to disagree appropriately before back talking is an issue (proactive parenting is always better than reactive parenting)
  5. Praise your child for choosing to disagree appropriately.

 

Disagreeing Appropriately

Stephen Covey says, “Seek to understand, then to be understood.”  This principle, if understood in childhood, can create an assertive person who is likely to have many leadership positions and successful relationships. 

To properly disagree appropriately to parents, a child should announce his intentions by saying, “May I disagree appropriately?” 

Understanding parents always say, “yes” to such an inquiry. 

Then the youth proceeds to say what he “understands” about what the other person is feeling.  After he shows he respects the parent enough to understand where they are coming from, then he shares his perspective of a decision or situation, and his desire for a different decision to be made by the parent.

This straight forward, yet humble, approach to disagreeing unites parents and children instead of engaging them in relationship destroying power struggles like standard, selfish disagreements tend to do. 

The Positive Consequence

After a child sees that when he disagrees appropriately he often gets his way, he sees there is an attractive positive consequence for choosing to respect his parents; increased personal freedom.  Getting your way is a kind of freedom which shows that the parent trusts the child. 

When a child feels real trust he is more likely to repeat the respectful behavior which helped him earn that trust.  Then the beginning of a respectful relationship is born. 

It is important that parents remember the point of parenting is to build a long lasting respectful relationship.  The point isn't how many cookies a person has had, or what time they go to bed.  So, if you take the time to teach your child to disagree appropriately, then make sure they see it often works.  This positive consequence will encourage self-government.  Which, after all, is what we work so hard at teaching our children each day of their lives. 

There is no greater gift we can give our children than an environment where self-government is taught, because the greatest battle any of us fight in this life is the battle of choosing to follow the heart over following the body.  People who learn to master themselves, can lead others to do the same; which is the essence of greatness in this world. 

I don't know about you, but that is what I want for my children.  

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Once There Was a Snowman...

by Krystal Swan

 


We’ve finally gotten some real snow, here in “Happy Valley”. To celebrate, the kids and I have been working on a snowman unit to practice our comparing words like “big, bigger, biggest”.



Our first project was a paper plate snowman. The kids received one paper plate for each letter in their name, plus one for the head. I had my four-year-old write his own letters, and my two- year-old traced letters that I cut out for him. And since I needed three snowman, for comparison purposes, I made one for my one-year-old as well. Once the letters were made, we hooked the paper plates together on top of each other to look like snowmen and decorated them with hats and scarves. Then we hung them up and use words like biggest, taller, smallest, shorter, etc. to describe the snowmen. We did sequences too, “Ivan’s snowman is tall, Adelia’s is taller, and Lincoln’s is the tallest of all!” 
  


Another day we did thumb print snowmen. We dipped our thumbs in white paint and pressed three thumb prints together on black construction paper to make snowmen. I let the kids do as many snowmen as they wanted. Then we decorated them with faces and scarves and arms. Then, using the opposite end of the paint brush, I had them dip it in white, and make as many snowflakes as they wanted in the sky. Then we used a piece of chalk to make the ground for the snowmen to stand on. Once our paintings were dry we filled in the blanks on the poem by counting the number of snowflakes and the number of snowmen. The poem goes like this: "______ little snowflakes fall into sight. While ______ little snowmen played all night." Then decide if you have more snowmen and less snowflakes, or the other way around. 


 

 

 

 

For a fun snack, we made snowmen-kabobs using bananas for the body, an apple slice and a grape for the hat, pretzels for the arms, a strip of fruit leather for the scarf, an orange sprinkle for the nose, and cake icing for eyes and mouth. I thought they turned out really cute, and they were tasty too! 
 

 

 

 



We made a marshmallow snowman, and talked about which circles had more marshmallows and which had less. We also talked about big, bigger, and biggest circles.

 

 


And our last big project was a yarn stitched snowman. This one was great for fine motor and concentration skills. You just take a big paper plate and a little paper plate, and punch out holes, then you use yarn to "sew" around the edges. My kids were most excited about gluing the buttons on. Once they were on we compared the buttons, "Are there more red buttons or yellow buttons?", “Are their less orange buttons than red buttons?", "Which color of buttons are there the most/least of."

And of course, Once There Was a Snowman, is a great song to use for this unit.

Once there was a snowman, snowman, snowman
Once there was a snowman, 
Tall, tall, tall
In the sun he melted, melted, melted
In the sun he melted
Small, small, small.

Maybe tomorrow we can finish up the unit by going outside and building a snowman with all the fresh snow we're getting at the moment.

 

 

You can leave your thoughts, comments or suggestions here on my feedback page. Thanks!

- Krystal

It Keeps on Rollin’

It’s stuck in my head:  “Ol’ man river, ‘Dat ol’ man river… He jes’ keeps rollin’, He keeps on rollin’ along.” My dad used to sing this old Show Boat tune and I’ve been thinking of it a lot the past few weeks with the coming of a new year.  Like the ever onward flow of the Mississippi, time keeps rolling along, too, whether I’m ready to move on or not. 


Each New Year’s celebration brings mixed feelings.  Looking ahead with faith, hope, and excitement; grateful for the blessings of the past; I still savor, and mourn, what is over and only kept in memory--each fleeting year of my children’s childhood. I’ve loved every second of their lives and sometimes panic when I do the math and realize how much time has passed and how little time is left before they move on.

As sometimes happens, these emotions got the better of me one day. It wasn’t just any day.  It was the last day of a family vacation, and the last day I could say that my son had never been to public school; he was to begin his freshman year the following morning by taking a couple of electives at the junior high school. It had been a fabulously fun and luxuriously leisurely camping trip and I didn’t want to go home.  Even though the decision for him to take some public school classes had been made with much prayer and I knew it was right for him, I still didn’t want to let him go.  He, on the other hand, was eager and looking forward to the new adventure.  Our opposing emotions collided at the end of a morning hike; he was upset that I wasn’t happy for him and I was upset that he was so excited.  Then I said, much too loudly, “Well excuse me for loving you so much that I want to spend every possible second with you that I can.”  I burst into tears and ran to the dock on the lake. 

I sat sobbing on the dock and it didn’t take long for him to follow me there.  We sat there on the lake, mother and son, both in apologetic silence.  A quiet, confiding conversation emerged and we found a new understanding of one another.  Aware that the ticking of the clock of life would crescendo once we went home, I tried to breathe in those last few moments of summer, and essentially, the last few moments of my son’s innocent childhood, and store them forever in my heart.

You might think all was well from that moment, but it wasn’t.  And I don’t even wish I could say that it was, for as I continued to struggle with missing my son and the way life was before, I turned to prayer and pondering and was blessed with an epiphany. 

There is a place I like to go on my runs that is out in the fields in the country, where the only sounds are red-winged blackbirds, an occasional vole foraging in the brush, the wind in the grass, maybe a red-tailed hawk looking for the vole, and the running water of a canal.  I went there a lot the first few weeks of school that year, to pour out my heart, to cry, to listen.  One of those days, I sat quietly staring at the moving water, watching leaves come and go in the current.  Most leaves came into view on my right, passed in front of me, and traveled to my left out of sight.  A few of the leaves, on the fringes of the current, got stopped up by rocks or canal debris, their progress halted.  One of the leaves got stuck in a small whirlpool, only to circle and circle and circle the same 6-inch area over and over and over.  Suddenly, and yet with a slowly spreading radiance emanating from the deepest places of my soul, I knew that this was Heavenly Father showing me, plainly, unmistakably, beautifully, and lovingly the course of mortality.

The poet Austin Dobson said it this way:  

Time goes, you say? Ah no!
Alas, Time stays, we go.

The leaves in the water were showing me that the intended path of life is one that “keeps on rollin’.” Birth, childhood, adolescence, adulthood, parenthood—growing up is traveling the current of mortality.  It’s right in this life for each person to enter and exit, to move through and on.  Just as those leaves passed through that section of canal, never to return to that particular place in their journey, their journey went on, and it wasgood for it to do so.  Those leaves that didn’t travel on were the ones at a loss; their progress was halted and they were left in stagnant waters, or they floated in futility in fruitless, pointless circles.  Neither of these latter scenarios could be what Heavenly Father intends for His children.  It was from this moment that I accepted the change.

I remember once telling my mother that I wished my kids would stop growing up, that they’d just stay little forever.  She smiled at me sadly and said, “I used to think that way, too, until it happened.”  You see, my brother died when he was 7 (I was 13). His was a moving on, just in a different current.

Robert Frost once said, “In three words I can sum up what I’ve learned about life:  It goes on.”  Thank God that it does.  I still have days that I’d love to have my kids little again.  Some days I look at photos from years ago and don’t know whether to laugh or cry.  But I love the people they’re growing up to be.  As much as I miss the delights of the past, I relish in the new enchantments of today.  And always, I’m grateful for every extra minute homeschooling has given me to spend with these amazing individuals.

 

You can leave your thoughts, comments or suggestions here on my feedback page. Thanks!

- Sasha

The Squirmy Days

A couple of weeks ago I went mountain biking for the very first time. I learned how to lower my center of gravity and sit far back from the handle bars. Last week I finally learned how to make a loaf of gluten free yeast bread. Over the last few weeks I have been learning how to care for our dog, which was recently diagnosed with diabetes. (A month ago I didn’t even know dogs could get diabetes!) I have been busy designing a new garden, figuring out how to use a new history curriculum, organizing a new home school group and entertaining a lot of family. Life has been full and busy, which is great except for one thing: I’m a writer (at least a wanna-be writer) and I am preoccupied by so many things I can’t write. The thought of sitting down for even 30 minutes and organizing my thoughts on a single topic is almost torturous.


My early bout of spring fever has given me some serious empathy for my squirmy, active children. Sometimes they are excited about our day’s written work, but there are other days when glares and moans of agony are all that meet my request to get out a pencil. So what’s a mom to do when neither she nor her children can sit still?  Here are a few things that seem to help with those wiggly days.

  1. Establish a routine. At our house we try to start our seated work at approximately the same time every morning. When we all know what to expect it’s easier to settle into the day.
     
  2. Take frequent breaks. Sometimes it is tempting to make kids sit until they’re done with an assignment, especially when they are stalling and droopy. However, I find that if I have them run a few stairs or spend a few minutes on the trampoline they come back energized and ready to get to work.
     
  3. Work movement into the lesson plan. When I let my kids color or play with Legos while I read aloud it helps everyone focus on the material. Any project that doesn’t involve a pencil and paper is always met with enthusiasm. 
     
  4. Encourage study and exploration of topics that are of interest to the kids. We are all better at focusing when we’re studying something that is interesting to us. 
     
  5. Break up the routine. As important as routines are, life gets pretty darn boring when we do the same exact thing every. single. day.
     
  6. Recognize that there truly are times and seasons. It is normal for interests to ebb and flow. All I wanted to do all summer was write. I wrote and wrote and wrote. Now it’s like pulling teeth. So I’m going to cut myself some slack, learn and do things that are more in tune with my current energy levels, and recognize that not all learning has to be done with a pencil and paper.

 

You can leave your thoughts, comments or suggestions here on my feedback page. Thanks!

- Lisa